Bremain - Museums In!

This week we look at the arguments for museums to stay in Europe. I have taken as the source of the 'Bremain' facts Pro Europa (http://www.proeuropa.org.uk) a cross-party unincorporated group which seems (counter intuitively) administrative and regulation light - they clearly don't understand Europe. However the fact that they have 13 reasons to stay compare to the Brexit's 10, obviously means the weight of argument is in pro Europe's favour. Or is it? As Boris Johnson said,

"...there are no disasters, only opportunities. And, indeed, opportunities for fresh disasters."

1. Jobs

Erroneous stat alert. Around 3.5 British museum jobs are directly linked to membership of the European Union – that is currently 1 in 10 British museum jobs. I think that says more about the British museum job market than our links to Europe.


2. Exports & investment

Museums lends and loans objects to and from Europe, as well as everywhere else. Leaving Europe will mean less support for loans to and from Europe. And the Greeks aren't going to get the Elgin marbles back EU or not.


3. Trade

British museums are more of a legacy of Empire than Europe. You may not have noticed the end of Empire (some curators in major museums please take note). What we are now in is a period of barbarian invasions (if you believe the Daily Mail) which equates to c400AD to 1065AD. How much active contemporary collecting are museums doing to reflect this? Leaving Europe will just change that to war with France and/or Germany (1066 - 1945) of which we have got loads of stuff in museum stores. So in short museums should stay in Europe and bring their collecting policies up to date NOW.

4. Consumer clout

British museums enjoy lower plumbing charges, (Poles),  lower maintenance charges (Lithuanians), cheap car washes in disused petrol stations (Latvians), easier access to contract hit men (Albanians), great customer care (French), hilarious comedy (Germans) - I could go on. These sorts of benefits could not be achieved by Britain alone.

5. Clean environment

You no longer get food poisoning in museum cafes, dengue fever from our toilet seats, strange rashes from handling the guide book, or that faint whiff of pickled onions from museum room stewards. That is good for Britain and good for Britons holidaying at home.

6. Power to curb the multinationals

The EU has taken on multinational giants like Microsoft, Samsung and Toshiba for unfair competition by cutting museum funding so that they can't afford to buy products from these companies. A retired volunteer standing in the corner of the exhibition will always be cheaper than plasma screens and interactive computers. The UK would not be able to do this alone.

7. Freedom to work and study abroad – and easy travel

If you don't like working in a British museum, your driving licence issued in the UK is valid throughout the EU so get on the ferry and find another job.

8. Peace and democracy

Peace throughout Europe has allowed museums to concentrate on commemorating battles, having war weekends and hiring re-enactment societies to keep the real ale industry afloat and the NHS overstretched. The alternative is unthinkable.

9. Equal pay and non-discrimination

Equal pay for men and women is enshrined in EU law, as are bans on discrimination by age, race or sexual orientation. This benefits museums by making wages too high that they all have to be run by volunteers of any age, gender, race etc.

10. Influence in the world

Britain museums have a great reputation around the world and that is because of the EU.  The world sees Europe and then recognises that British museums are the best. If we leave Europe who can we compare ourselves to? The logic is flawless. We have better museums because we are in Europe.

11. Cutting red tape

If we didn't have red tape what does the Mayor cut when she opens our new exhibitions? Answer me that.

12. Fighting crime

The European Arrest Warrant replaced long extradition procedures and enables the UK to extradite criminals wanted in other EU countries, and bring to justice criminals wanted in the UK who are hiding in other EU countries. Hmmm... perhaps it is better we leave. It was only once and I blame the cheap wine (EU subsidised no doubt), but the church was open and I felt our museum could do with a minor renaissance master triptych for the Unreason monastery display. Luckily by painting a moustache on the Virgin Mary no-one has noticed yet


13. Research funding

The UK is the second largest beneficiary of EU research funds, and the British Government expects future EU research funding to constitute a vital source of income for our world-leading universities and companies and one day museums might get some. 

Well you've had the balanced arguments, now its time for you to decide. Please vote by sending unmarked cash to me and I'll spend the results.