Something for an English Summer?

The Meteorological Office has confirmed that this has been the wettest June on record (records actually began in 1910 - but I suspect we'd been having bad weather well before then). But this was not confined to June. We've had the wettest April-June ever. The total amount of rain in June was 145.3mm (getting on for 6 inches in old money).  With the unsettled weather due to continue due to something to do with the Jet Stream, what should museums do? Normally its time to invest in outdoor event and activities. 

Or should we take our direction from 'Ark Encounter' (https://arkencounter.com/) in Kentucky and build something with a eye to the future (or past?). Does your museum have a spare $100m, then this could be your way forward. A 510 feet long (300 cubits) ark.  It is handy that the Bible, as well as offering an accurate history of civilisation, is also an early IKEA instruction booklet to build your own, species survival craft. 

“And this is how you shall make it: The length of the ark shall be three hundred cubits, its width fifty cubits, and its height thirty cubits.” (Genesis 6:15)

Credit: AP*

There's no need to rush, at the current rate of rain it will take 58,000 months to cover Mount Everest in water. Although I suspect humanity will be in trouble long before them. But I think museums would need the time to get to grips with their disposal policies, so that there will be enough room in the ark to house their collections.

Am I being pessimistic? You just need to ask yourself when did you last see a rainbow?

And God said, “This is the sign of the covenant I am making between me and you and every living creature with you, a covenant for all generations to come: 13 I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth. 14 Whenever I bring clouds over the earth and the rainbow appears in the clouds, 15 I will remember my covenant between me and you and all living creatures of every kind. Never again will the waters become a flood to destroy all life. 16 Whenever the rainbow appears in the clouds, I will see it and remember the everlasting covenant between God and all living creatures of every kind on the earth.” (Genesis 9:12)

Next time it rains and a rainbow fails to appear, get on the first flight to Kentucky with your favourite object. Or get those strange bits of wood in your museum store that you never knew what they were for, but could never bring yourself to throw out, and start building. It is your duty as a curator to preserve your collection, people may think you are mad, but future generations will thanks you.






http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/07/07/noahs-ark-replica-unveiled-in-kentucky-amid-anger-at-scientifica/

Pictures of Cats With Funny Expressions on their Faces

Last week during my blog I discovered the secret of life. Somewhat surprisingly I found it in a car park in Louisville, Kentucky. It is strange the links that are made in life that eventually lead to self actualisation, but there it is. Alas rumour has it that this will now form the plot for Dan Brown's next novel. So I can only apologise to the car park users as I expect the lot to be full with tourists from now on (once they find it).

Anyway, this week I promised pictures of cats with funny expressions on their faces.

This is my cat Lulu, named after the diminutive Scottish teen pop singer from the 60s. Why? I suppose you haven't heard my cat sing.

Happy Lulu

Serious Lulu

Reflective Lulu

Angry Lulu

Lulu in love

Can I go now?

Taking cat photos was not as easy as I expected. Just google 'cat' and millions of cute felines suddenly appear - how is that possible? I follow my cat for days taking photographs and nothing cute happens. Although I did rip my trousers falling out of a tree in the local park, and the old lady I fell on didn't find the experience cute at all. It was only when the policeman examined the boring cat images on the camera was I allowed to leave the station - 4 hours later.

Frustrated, I took action. When I attempted to put a clown's nose on Lulu, she objected. It wasn't a fair fight. She was young, quick, angry and well armed and I wasn't. I beat a hasty retreat as I didn't want to go into work with mysterious marks on my face again. So I ended up with these photos - and from this moment on let it be known that all other cat pictures on the internet have been Photoshopped - do not believe them.

This incident confirmed what I had always suspected - I had a small dose of ailurophobia*, but also made me realise I had a big dose of amychophobia**. This got me thinking about phobias. It is well known that Alfred Mosher Butts invented Scrabble to overcome his hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia***. I'm not sure I've spelt that correctly because my word processor's angry caterpillar immediately underlined it. I then realised it was set at U.S. English so took out any unnecessary 'u's and swapped the 's's for 'z's - that didn't help at all - the caterpillar just got angrier. So I set my spellchecker to 'English' English and ignored the caterpillar confident in the knowledge that machines don't know everything.

Anyway, all this got me thinking about phobias. Then it got me thinking about phobias in museums. It is thought that the director of a certain farming museum is an agoraphobe****, and rumour has it that the Visitor Services Manager at the People's History Museum is an alektorophobe*****.

So this week I will be conducting a survey at the Museum of Unreason to discover and then report on the ten most common phobias in the heritage world  - watch this space (unless, of course, you are an astrophobe).

* fear of cats
** fear of being scratched
*** fear of long words
**** fear of tractors - probably
***** fear of chickens