In my constant efforts at self improvement I was drawn to an article on 'lean writing'. The thrust of the article suggested that you could easily cut out 10 unnecessary words from your sentences. The words in question were:
Just
Really
Very
Perhaps/maybe
Quite
Amazing
Literally
Stuff
Things
Got
I'm sure you have written a sentence with all of them in before. I have.
'Just a short note to really thank you very much for all the quite literally amazing stuff you've donated to the museum which we've already got, so perhaps you maybe want to retrieve your things from the skip out the back''
Now try that sentence without the unnecessary words.
''A short note to thank you for all you've donated to the museum which we have already, so you can retrieve it all from the skip out the back'''
It works! So not everything you read on the internet is bad advice.
But the larger point is that we can be prisoners of our language, free up some words and free up your mind. Can this liberating effect be applied to museums? What words can a museum do without? What would be the effect? Here are some suggestions in no particular order:
Backlog
Accreditation
Trustee
Friends
Curator
Concession
School
Conservation
Object
Volunteer
Abolish those words and instantly your museum is a happier place. You don't have a backlog! Yippee. No objects and no conservation issues means we don't have to have a curator, instantly creating savings. With no concessions you can charge full price all the time. You'll have no friends (nothing new there), but no trustees telling you what to do either. They just turn into greying busybodies and therefore indistinguishable from the paying public. With no volunteers they'll just become unpaid staff, and therefore you can now sack the staff who have the temerity to ask for pay - yet more savings! No school groups means no graffiti in the toilets and no headaches at the end of the day from all the noise. Finally, no accreditation and heritage nirvana is surely reached while the dustbin will be full of unloved and unused paperwork.
Just reflect on that for a moment and don't pretend that I'm not offering you a seductive vision of the future for your museum.
I might apply this to my personal life, and after the week I've had I'm going to abolish the following:
Rain
Queue
Tax
Breathalyser
Fine
Mortgage
Arrears
Cholesterol
Erectile dysfunction
Hangover
Happy Friday 13th to one and all!
*http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/229369
Showing posts with label backlog. Show all posts
Showing posts with label backlog. Show all posts
Friday, 13 December 2013
Saturday, 7 January 2012
New Year's Resolution: Clear that backlog
Happy New Year dear reader.
After a Christmas break watching reviews of the year which singularly failed to mention the museum crisis in this country I began thinking about starting 2012 off as positively as possible given that the world is apparently guaranteed to end on 21st December 2012. This gives plenty of time for the conscientious museum professional to meet his or her maker with their museum meeting current accreditation standards.
So here is my to do list.
1. CLEAR THE ACCESSIONING BACKLOG ONCE AND FOR ALL. I can't allow everything to be destroyed in a global apocalypse without being properly recorded.
2. I realise I am unable create the time to do it myself, so I will apply for small grant funding to employ part time staff to clear the backlog.
3. In the current circumstances money is thin on the ground so I will instead recruit new volunteers and train them up to do it.
4. I don't have time to train volunteers myself. So I will recruit fully trained registrars as volunteers thereby cynically using the glut of recently unemployed museum professionals.
5. All unemployed registrars will still want paying and have already set themselves up as consultants so I will create four backlog clearance timetables based upon objectives 1-4.
6. I don't have time to create four timetables, so I will simply re-write the collections management strategy to reflect the available resources to clear the backlog.
7. Sod it - I'll just call it all a 'handling collection'.
8. Bugger - objections from the Education Manager means I will ethically dispose of the backlog, or failing that sell the stuff on ebay.
9. Bollocks - museums don't want to increase their collections and the trustees don't want to be seen to be selling their stuff.
10. Hire a skip and hope nobody notices before 21st December.
Happy New Year
After a Christmas break watching reviews of the year which singularly failed to mention the museum crisis in this country I began thinking about starting 2012 off as positively as possible given that the world is apparently guaranteed to end on 21st December 2012. This gives plenty of time for the conscientious museum professional to meet his or her maker with their museum meeting current accreditation standards.
So here is my to do list.
1. CLEAR THE ACCESSIONING BACKLOG ONCE AND FOR ALL. I can't allow everything to be destroyed in a global apocalypse without being properly recorded.
2. I realise I am unable create the time to do it myself, so I will apply for small grant funding to employ part time staff to clear the backlog.
3. In the current circumstances money is thin on the ground so I will instead recruit new volunteers and train them up to do it.
4. I don't have time to train volunteers myself. So I will recruit fully trained registrars as volunteers thereby cynically using the glut of recently unemployed museum professionals.
5. All unemployed registrars will still want paying and have already set themselves up as consultants so I will create four backlog clearance timetables based upon objectives 1-4.
6. I don't have time to create four timetables, so I will simply re-write the collections management strategy to reflect the available resources to clear the backlog.
7. Sod it - I'll just call it all a 'handling collection'.
8. Bugger - objections from the Education Manager means I will ethically dispose of the backlog, or failing that sell the stuff on ebay.
9. Bollocks - museums don't want to increase their collections and the trustees don't want to be seen to be selling their stuff.
10. Hire a skip and hope nobody notices before 21st December.
Happy New Year
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