A Museum Christmas Carol

St.Acetone, patron saint of museum workers composed this Christmas carol in a Byzantine prison cell where he was facing charges of excessive cleaning in the face of silver artefact tarnishing.

Any similarity to the tune of Away in a Manger is entirely coincidental


A day in a museum, no dosh and mislead,
The hassled curator lays down his tired head,
The boss in the office walked to where
he lay,
The sleeping curator was snoring away.

The public are moaning, the curator awakes
But tired curator, no excuses he makes
He asks museum manager, come down from on high
And stay by the front desk till home time is nigh

desk bells they ring, they are rung out by visitors all day,
until tours are done and delivered until Christmas day,

Be near me, scotch whisky, I ask thee to stay
Close by me for ever and soothe me, I pray
Bless all underpaid curators with their unkempt hair
And take us to conference and drink the tea there

desk bells they ring, are rung out by visitors all day,
until tours are done, and delivered until Christmas day,
thank Christ was born, for our 1 day off is Christmas day



Festive greetings to museum staff and volunteers everywhere